How Do I Pray for My Enemies…Really?

In Matthew 5:43-44, Jesus said: “You have heard that it was said, ‘You shall love your neighbor and hate your enemy.’ But I say to you, love your enemies and pray for those who persecute you.” (New American Standard Bible, 1995, Matt. 5:43-44)

The call to love and pray for enemies had to be as arresting to first century hearers as it is for us today. Can’t you just imagine them hearing this, and thinking like we do, “You want us to do what?! You do know what they did to us…right?!”

Our enemies often make it last on our prayer list, if at all.

And, if we do pray for them, as we pray for them, we tend to get mired down in the muck of replaying what they did to us, and we can even feel that we are suffering further injustice as we are praying for God to benefit and reward the very ones who harmed us.

Yet, we all know that what God commands is good and right. So, how do we move forward with whole-hearted, sincere prayer for our enemies?

There are three critical convictions we must have in place if we are going to do what Christ commands.

Conviction #1: I am a sinner, and no greater wrong has been done to me than what I have done to God.

Why is this conviction so critical if we are going to pray for our enemies?

Because without it, we will feel, perceive and believe that God is asking us to do something greater than He has done for us, and again, that will feel like added injustice to the injustice we have already suffered at our enemy’s hands.

Additionally, this conviction safeguards us against a deceptive self-righteousness that feels justified in withholding what God has given us, despite the fact we didn’t deserve it: forgiveness.

Conviction #2: God is a God of justice, and He judges perfectly.

If we are going to pray for our enemies, we also have to believe that God is a God of justice - total justice, perfect justice.

Deuteronomy 32:4: “The Rock! His work is perfect,

For all His ways are just;

A God of faithfulness and without injustice,

Righteous and upright is He.

(New American Standard Bible, 1995, Deut. 32:4)

In God’s perfect justice, God keeps a record of everything done in the body and every word spoken – both good and bad (2 Corinthians 5:10; Matthew 12:36), and all of us will be accountable for all we have done.

Coloissians 3:25: For he who does wrong will receive the consequences of the wrong which he has done, and that without partiality. (New American Standard Bible, 1995, Col. 3:25)

If we are going to pray for our enemies, we must be convinced that there is nothing that escapes God’s notice, that there is nothing that escapes God’s care.

Otherwise, we will wrongly imagine that as we pray for God to bless our enemies, we are asking God to overlook the wrong they have done…or worse, dismiss it as okay.

That leads to conviction #3.

Conviction #3: Praying for blessing means praying for repentance.

The third conviction that is needed for us to pray for our enemies is clarity on what we are praying when we are praying for our enemies’ blessing.

All too often, we imagine that praying for our enemies’ blessing means that we are praying for their circumstantial ease, financial benefit, career advancement or something else along those lines.

In reality, when we are praying for our enemies to be blessed, we are praying for nothing to stand between them and God, including the wrong they have done to us.

And how does a wrong – that is standing between any of us and God – get removed, biblically? Does it happen through us denying or minimizing what we have done? No, it comes through our repentance and God’s forgiveness in response to that, and only through that.

1 John 1:9 tells us, “If we confess our sins, He is faithful and righteous to forgive us our sins and to cleanse us from all unrighteousness.” (New American Standard Bible, 1995, 1 John 1:9)

When we sin, would we prefer to stand before the judgment seat of Christ someday to receive our judgment for having done so…or would we prefer to know about it now, repent of it now, and come under the mercy of Christ and receive forgiveness for it now?

For some of us it’s hard to reconcile how God showing mercy squares with God being a God of justice, so let’s press into this.

When God shows us mercy in response to our repentance, does He deny judgment and justice in doing so? Does He minimize our sin and say it’s not a big deal? Does He call it something other than it is? No! He takes it upon Himself on the cross!

When we’re praying for God to bless our enemies, assuming they have actually wronged us, we’re praying for our enemies to see their sin, repent of their sin, and have justice met at the cross (versus preferring for them to “get what they deserve” when they stand before Christ someday).

Now, does having these three convictions in place make praying for our enemies easy? Not necessarily, but as we continue to pray for our enemies, we can be confident that God’s Spirit will continue to strengthen and transform us in the process.

Over time, we will go from praying hesitantly for them, to praying freely for them, to praying with a holy ache for God’s testimony of mercy to be written in their lives.

Every weekend, a number of people at our church gather for pre-service prayer. Several months ago, God led us to incorporate praying for our enemies toward the start of our prayer times.

A few weeks into that new practice, we were joined by a Christan refugee family from Afghanistan, who had just arrived to the States and to our church just days before.

This family had suffered terribly at the hands of the Taliban. Many of their brothers and sisters in Christ were martyred. Their homes and possessions were completely ripped away. They were terrorized and hunted and wronged in so many ways.

And yet, that day, as we prayed, they led out in praying for the salvation of members of the Taliban. In the midst of their suffering, they were crying out for their oppressor’s salvation with fervent, earnest intercession.

How could they do that? How could they pray that way? And how can we?

Only by remembering God’s mercy to us, by resting in God’s perfect justice and by remembering that praying for blessing means praying for repentance.

Back to Articles